When i'm standing on the yellow line

2 weeks ago i was supposed to have a nice 4 day vacation sipping liquid oxygen and baking myself in the sun. Last week, i cancelled a 3 day driving/cycling/eating trip for said 4-day vacation. Within a span of a month i have missed out on two jalan jalan expeditions for reasons i shall not mention here.

And after all said and done, i'm left here frustrated like having an erection in the middle of the day and seeing nothing to fuck.
God knows how much i love travelling and need a decent holiday!

I miss the heavy beat of my heart seeing the blue darkness underneath me as i swim above a 600m deep underwater ravine.
I miss the dirt on my face as i walk along busy sidewalks filled with traffic and honking cars.
I miss complaining about the slightly dingy hotels and the lack of water.
I miss heat thats so hot, a glass of Coke feels like drinking a cup of heaven.
I miss walking till my legs hurt that at night i just collapse into bed and fall into slumber in a blink of an eye.
I miss cold thats so numbing, your hands freeze and your lips go dry.

I'm in pieces
It seems like peace is
The only thing I never know
How do you get up from an all time low

I can't even find a place to start
How do I choose between my head and heart?

till it ceases I never know

How do you get up from an all time low